If you do not want to grow infantile sad sack, which is absolutely not adapted to life, then never do for the child, these 8 things.
What not to do for the children? / istockphoto.com
Speak instead of the child
When children are small, the questions addressed to them, we answer. Hardly one year old toddler answer his name. But children grow up, and parents do not give up their habit to speak for them. And often you can see the picture when the mother is responsible for the teenager.What does it lead? The child has reduced self-esteemHe stops to take the initiative in their hands and did not learn to speak for themselves.
choose friends
Friends - an important part of our lives. They often have a greater impact on us than family. Knowing this, parents choose the child the "right" friends and "wrong" screened out.
What does it lead? The child does not learn to distinguish between their own and their people. With friends he fulfills certain behaviors, learning to negotiate, to quarrel and reconciled correctly. Useful skill, right?
Wanting him
Remember Odessa anecdote? Mom is calling his son on the street, and he asks her; time to go home, because he wants to eat? And my mother replied: "No! You're frozen! "The parents are told their child wants and make him realize them.
What does it lead? Razuchaetsya child to hear himself, he had not formed an opinion. In fact, parents raise a potential victim, which everyone will be able to impress their will.
self-help skills
2-3-year-old child should have the basic skills of self-service: it can clean up toys, carry a plate in the sink, remove and put on a lot of things, throw the dirty clothes in the laundry basket. At this age, they have a great desire to do everything yourself. But parents easier and faster to do for the child. And they do not teach self-service skills. And over the years, these skills should become more and more.
What does it lead? Becoming an adult, a person can not serve himself and believes that he should do it more.
What not to do for the children? / istockphoto.com
choose hobbies
Do you like jazz, but your child listens to you all day long hated rock. Or draw clothes and sew them to the doll, even though the boy. We often try to impose their own children hobby, hobbies and tastes. Well, if he, too, will like, and if not?Where it leads? The child will suppress individuality, his self-esteem fall, he will begin to think that it tastes terrible, because he himself is.
regulate finances
To determine the lifetime of the child begins pocket money. Just at this time he has to learn to make mistakes with them, so that in 25 years has to be able to manage money. But parents begin to consider the child's money, arrange questioning how much is left, or even worse - climb on bags and pockets.
Where it leads? The child does not learn to be responsible for their own expenses. As a result, in adult life have a better chance to make a big financial mistake.
Assign his successes
The child began to walk? It is your merit! Went to school? Of course, it's you done! I graduated with honors. Who has done? Parents love to assign merits children themselves. And do not forget to remind them that without their parents they would have no one and nothing is achieved.
What does it lead? Children are very unpleasant when they arrogate to themselves the success. Yes, you have led the child on mugs and now he is a master of sports. But you jumped with tape across the room, wiping his feet in the blood. Enjoy the success of children can and should be. But it is their success. You earn your own.
Choose a mate
When a teen begins the first love, the parents screen out unwanted and choose "good" mate. Either brazenly walk into the personal life, arranging interrogation.
What does it lead? The child does not learn to make mistakes and to understand people, it loses credibility and will not share secret.
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