Many people think that with marriage, life becomes just bright, carefree and easy. In fact, everything is completely different, or rather, there will be bright moments in the relationship and not so much. I propose to dispel 5 myths about marriage and say goodbye to those expectations that the brain diligently draws. If you do not accept the truth, then you can be disappointed in family life, and in the second half, and in yourself.
Myths about marriage
Getting married will save the relationship
No. This is not true. How often women, being in a toxic relationship, or those that are on the verge of breaking up, try to quickly jump out to marry a partner, thinking that everything will certainly work out. It won't get better, my dear ladies! And it will only get worse! If your relationship has become unbearable, then neither marriage nor the birth of a child will fix anything. Marriage is not a cure. If there are problems in the relationship, then they need to be solved. And if you don’t trust each other, don’t know how to compromise and listen to each other, if there is disrespect in your couple, then sooner or later all this will come out in marriage.
Husband and wife belong to each other
How stupid it is, you are not cars, apartments, not property! When you marry, your partner does not become your slave, and you do not become his serf. You are not things, but living people! Yes, with marriage, both of you have certain responsibilities, but you both need to have a personal life and personal space. You do not have to give up your passions, hobbies and friends, even if you officially become someone's wife or someone's husband.
Husband and wife must agree with each other in everything
No. Each of you can have your own opinion and your own view on this or that situation. Yes, you can all match, you can, and should have, the same values and views on the family, but you are not obliged to agree with each other on everything. There will be disputes and disagreements, and the most important thing here is to learn how to compromise, to discuss emerging problems. You should not think that if your partner does not want children now, then as soon as you get married, he will immediately want them, etc.
Husband and wife should have intimacy on demand
Is it good when intimacy occurs under duress? No, even in marriage it is considered violence. And there is no marital duty in reality, people invented it. You need to make love only by mutual agreement, and this, in principle, can happen without a stamp in your passport. You can’t force anyone, coerce, etc., respect the desires and body of your partner. If your spouse constantly refuses you, think about the reason. Maybe you yourself are to blame? Be rude, insult, do not pay attention to your soulmate, think only about your pleasure during sex, etc.
You will live happily ever after
This, of course, is ideal - to live with one partner all your life in perfect harmony. But this is not the truth that awaits every marriage. I am sincerely happy for those people who live happily in marriage, but you have to be prepared that there will be disagreements, disputes, and sometimes even very difficult moments. The stamp in the passport does not insure anyone against any life hardships, no problems evaporate at once as soon as you get married. Any relationship, including marriage, requires constant work, life will not be a fairy tale, there will not be a permanent rainbow in the sky, this happens only in fairy tales.
What other myths about marriage should be debunked?
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