Admit it, have you ever, at least once in your life, been visited by a toad syndrome called envy? And someone suffers them all the time! This emotion is not as sharp as, say, jealousy or resentment, but it is stable and long-lasting. Envy poisons life, eating a person from the inside.
Why is it so difficult for people to perceive someone else's success?
Maybe it's because they have high expectations. And they are simply annoyed that they are forced to grumble for days at an unloved and hard job, while for someone everything is given very quickly and simply.
Sometimes envy is called jealousy for someone else's life. But it's not the same. There are at least three involved in jealousy, and two in envy.
Do not immediately reproach yourself for envy. Unfortunately, you may also be innocent. And do not forbid yourself to show this emotion, because you will drive it into the subconscious, it will not disappear completely, and then it will be much more difficult to deal with it.
The tendency to envy can be an echo from childhood. If parents constantly compared their child with other children, saying that they are better and their child is worse, this could turn into envy.
Sometimes a person has a very heightened sense of justice, and he thinks that someone is lucky at his expense. By the way, in this case, a person disguises his inaction under the fact that he is simply unlucky. He sees in someone or something the reasons for his failures, instead of looking for them in himself. And, of course, someone more successful is to blame for everything.
Another option is when a person not only compares himself with others, but he also has an inferiority complex. And again, the roots come from childhood. When parents compare their children to others, trying to point out that children do not eat well, do not know how to dress independently, naturally with the best of intentions, the child, instead of doing everything better, begins to feel himself defective. And it remains in the head for life, no matter what a person does, he will still be worse than the rest.
A person who is on the same social level with us is much more envious. In other words, we will envy our friend who bought himself a new car, and not some businessman who bought a whole yacht. Where are we, and where is the businessman!
Have you ever thought about what a person makes efforts to achieve what he has achieved? Maybe he doesn’t even need to envy, but hug him and pity him? He works hard, took out a loan, is malnourished, and so on. Are you ready for such sacrifices? Do you need it at all? I think no!
Sometimes people who are too demanding of themselves suffer from envy. It is very difficult for them to understand why they are trying to do everything right and clearly, but still nothing comes of it.
Most often, people from 18 to 27 are envious, and after 60 envy completely disappears. It’s just that only over the years it comes to many that it makes no sense to worry about what others have, but instead it’s better to appreciate those who are nearby and what is already there.
Sometimes comparing oneself with others motivates a person to develop, to become better. This can be said to be the white side of envy, but it will still irritate and eat from the inside.
And, unfortunately, no matter what causes envy, there is always one single truth for all causes! An envious person focuses only on external success, in other words, he only tries to appear beautiful and rich, instead of being one.
The original article is posted here: https://kabluk.me/psihologija/pochem-chelovek-zaviduet.html
