Dutch children are said to be the happiest. I don’t know if this is so, but if you get acquainted with the educational processes, we can confidently say that our mothers, of course, have a lot to learn from the Dutch!
Parenting secrets from Dutch mothers
Don’t sacrifice
It is worth understanding that children do not change the life of adults, they just supplement it. With the appearance of children in the family, the Dutch do not give up their personal life, they do not sacrifice themselves, their needs and hobbies for the sake of the baby. Agree, everything is a little different with us. Our women are so immersed in their motherhood that they generally forget about themselves. It's time to change.
No guilt
A point that follows from the previous one. If a mother takes care of herself, rests, is passionate about a hobby, instead of sitting with a child, she will not feel guilty. No one will label her as a "bad mother", they will not condemn her, because everyone does that! By the way, it is better for a child to live with an adequate, calm, balanced and rested mother than with an exhausted and nervous one. To be a good mom, it's important to avoid burnout, shed guilt, and enjoy your personal life.
Lack of materialism
Surprisingly, in Holland you will not find special children's departments filled with pink and blue bodysuits, hypoallergenic wipes, baby powders and other things / products that our mothers are ready to buy tons. How strange it is. Our children suffer from allergies to ordinary powder, the doctor recommends buying a special baby food, we choose baby food from a large number for a long time so that the baby will definitely like it. And Dutch mothers are more than calm about this. In stores they have 2-3 types of purees, there is no huge variety of clothes for babies, spoons, pacifiers. And I haven’t heard that children in Holland all suffer from allergies!
Do you know what? The child does not need any hypoallergenic purees and diapers at all, the mother needs them so that she can drown out her feelings of guilt! Dutch mothers are calm in this regard. They don't buy children's clothes and other goods, they don't buy all the toys. Why spend so much money on something that will not be enough in a month? And you can play different toys in special game rooms.
Keeping things flowing naturally
Pregnancy is not a disease, we say, but we ourselves make a cult out of it! Dutch women do not shake over their tummy, they ride bicycles and go to work until childbirth, and do not forget sports. They give birth naturally, without anesthesia, and in general, about 30% of women choose home birth.
Their children can play in general all their free time and everywhere, even at home, even in a restaurant, even on the street in the rain. In Holland, it is believed that it is through play that the baby learns the world. If a child is sick, he has snot-cough and even a temperature above 37, but he feels fine, he is taken to kindergarten. Of course, he will infect his peers, but this is how children "pump" their immunity!
No hard shoes, massage, colds are treated with vasoconstrictor drops and antipyretic drugs. It is all very difficult for us to accept, our mothers are used to wrapping, feeding, healing, stuffing with developmental toys. I just want to say: "Leave the child alone!"
Accepting a child as he is
Yes, we all love our children, but this does not mean that we accept them. We all have some plans for them, we set high goals for them, we have high expectations regarding them. It seems that from the very first days of a child's birth, we know who he will become. We teach, not show how to study, it seems to us that a red diploma and a university are a happy future.
Dutch mothers bother less in this regard, they accept the child with his successes and failures, with his assessments, with his behavior. They accept their children as they are.
Dutch mothers do not yell at their children, do not pull back at every step, do not threaten to punish for anything. Each of them considers her child to be a unique person who just needs help to express herself, to realize herself in the world, to love herself.
I think each of us should learn from these wise women!
The original article is posted here: https://kabluk.me/psihologija/5-sekretov-vospitaniya-detej-gollandskih-mam.html
