Children aged from 3 to 4 years old are going through a special, crisis period. At this time, you will not envy your parents. Tantrums, constant "no", protests. How to deal with an unruly child?
Children are definitely the flowers of life. But sometimes they know how to thoroughly spoil this very life with their uncontrollability. This happens especially often between the ages of 3 and 4 years. During this period, the child separates himself from his mother, he realizes himself as a separate person, requires power, recognition, independence. And often at the same time it becomes uncontrollable. He shouts, does not obey, behaves contrary to parental rules. For some, this may be of a point nature, for others it happens on an ongoing basis. There are several reasons for this.
Why does a child become uncontrollable
1. The center of the world
Often the only child in a family becomes king and God. He is indulged, parents are resigned to his whims. So the child gets used to being the center of the universe and simply does not understand the word "no" or "no". He needs "everything and immediately, at the same second." If whims are not fulfilled with lightning speed, thunder and lightning begins to throw.
2. Complete impunity
If a child is forgiven for bad deeds and disobedience, he simply ceases to feel the boundaries of what is permitted.
The child separates himself from his mother, he demands power, recognition, independence / istockphoto.com
3. Hyper-care
Constant restriction of the child's freedom, in order to protect him from injury, also badly affects his behavior. Children are cramped in the grip of overprotection, in order to escape from them, they begin to brawl and go contrary to everything that their parents say.
4. Everything comes from the family
If the parents scream and quarrel, it is foolish to forbid the child to do the same. Pay attention to adult behavior first. After all, children copy it. They, like a sponge, absorb everything.
5. Lack of clear limits
If the child does not have a clear understanding of what is allowed and what is not, do not expect obedience from him.
6. Hyperactivity
Now it is customary to call all uncontrollable children hyperactive. But this is a serious diagnosis that requires medical and psychological assistance. It implies a number of symptoms that require correction of behavioral disorders.
What to do if an uncontrollable child grows up in the family?
Periodic disobedience is normal. After all, we do not need a comfortable, but a happy child who knows how to refuse and say "no" to what he does not like. Therefore, do not try to completely subordinate your daughter or son to your will. But if, nevertheless, you feel that the child is already just sitting on your head and hanging his legs, then you need to take action.
- Communicate with your child more often, fill in the attention deficit. Often children begin to behave disgustingly in order to somehow attract the attention of their parents, who are endlessly busy with their own affairs.
- Praise for completed assignments.
- Work to prevent tantrums. Stick to the daily routine, do not watch a lot of cartoons with bright pictures. All this has an exciting effect on the nervous system, as a result, the child begins to become irritable and capricious.
Distract when the baby is about to explode / istockphoto.com
- Define a circle of "can" and "not". If the child goes beyond the limits of what is permissible, punish. How to punish a child correctly, read here.
- Speak out the rules as often as possible so that the punishment is not like snow on your head, but as a logical consequence of bad behavior
- Help your toddler express resentment in other ways. Let him say what he feels, beat the pillow or knock with his feet. Under no circumstances forbid getting angry. Teach let off steam in sustainable ways that do not harm other people.
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