There are relationships that charge you with good mood and optimism, and there are those that, on the contrary, deprive everyone of optimism and calmness. In the second version, you can talk about emotional vampirism.
The worst emotional vampires can make us think that we are nothing, that no one loves us or appreciates us. Seemingly simple words, phrases addressed to us, but such a loss! “You are too sensitive”, “you gained extra pounds”, “you don’t love me” - there are a lot of examples! As a result, our inner harmony is destroyed, self-esteem falls, pressure on our weak points occurs. Emotional vampires are found not only in love relationships, but today we are talking about men, although a woman can also vampire ...
How do you know that you have an emotional vampire next to you?
- When communicating with a person, it begins to seem that you want to sleep.
- Your mood changes for the worse.
- You have a desire to eat something harmful, well, or drink.
- You have anger, anxiety, anxiety.
- You start to feel bad overall.
To protect yourself from an emotional vampire, you need to "know him by sight." Here are the five most common types of pests and how to avoid falling prey to them.
Common types of emotional vampires
Narcissus
Narcissistic egoist who always puts himself first. He is sure that everything around him should revolve around him, he has a very inflated sense of his own importance, he believes that everyone owes and owes him. He needs adoration and attention. He does not know how to empathize and sympathize at all, and he is also unlikely to love. Such a "copy" will either move away from you very quickly if you do not do what he requires of you, or will somehow punish you.
What to do: I would not immediately advise you to even get involved with such a person, because daffodils are emotionally cold, you will be unhappy with such a man! Do not expect selfless love and selfless actions from him, do not share your innermost feelings with him, do not let your self-esteem depend on him!
Victim
Always sad, everything is bad for him, the whole world is against him, all around is full of stars. In general, he will do so that he will be pitied. Even if he has real problems, and you offer him an adequate solution to them, he will answer something like: "This is good, but ...".
Suppose he sits at home, does not work, and only does what whines about this. You yourself find options for him, and he either immediately looks for excuses not to go anywhere, or he goes, and then says that the boss there is bad, the salary is low, and in general they have brought the country, there are no conditions for work. All these complaints will exhaust you greatly, and you yourself will run away wherever you look.
What to do: Don't listen, set clear boundaries. It’s straightforward to say: “Sorry I have no time”, “I have things to do”, “Come on later” or in a tough way: “Stop whining!”. And don't look the person in the eye when he tells you about his fate again!
Controller
There are men who want to control everything around, dictate to everyone how to do and how not. On any issue, they have their own opinion. First they will affect your feelings, and then they will take control over you, they will tell you how to act and even how to feel. Constant pressure on you will turn into humiliation. As a result, you will be forced to live by someone else's rules and do what the vampire wants.
What to do: immediately set boundaries and never give up slack. And, of course, do not control the vampire yourself, learn to defend your opinion, be confident in yourself, but do not tell the controller what he needs to do.
Chatterbox
These are the ones who are ready to talk to all their friends on the phone and with all the neighbors at the entrance in a day. And when people around you suddenly end, they will switch to you. With their excessive chatter, they will steal your free time, and also load your head with negativity.
What to do: Start interrupting the chatterbox, confidently expressing your time, refer to your busyness, and do not listen to him. This is probably the most harmless emotional vampire among the rest, but it is really difficult to calm him down, he does not even allow a word to be inserted.
Drama king
The alarmist who always blows the elephant out of a fly. After communicating with such it becomes very bad. All the problems of the world and their influence on us will swarm in your head, saturating it with negativity.
What to do: set frames, boundaries, and urgently! Explain immediately what topics you do not want to listen to conversations, let them become taboo in your relationship. You can not listen to the negative, especially if you are very suspicious and sensitive to other people's words.
Choose your environment carefully, especially the man with whom you intend to build a relationship. It is better to spend more time with those who support you and sincerely listen to you. And in relationships, you need to learn to build clear boundaries with those who suck all the energy out of you.
The original article is posted here: https://kabluk.me/psihologija/5-tipov-muzhchin-emocionalnyh-vampirov-kotorye-razrushajut-nashu-zhizn-sposoby-zashhity-ot-nih.html
