Many parents attribute to impose their quality and children, they do not possess. Child by copying one of the parents, suddenly showing some quality and the father or mother are starting to hang their expectations
Unjustified expectations arise from the child's parents because of their unfulfilled desires and hopes. Not enrolled in journalism, I not learned English and became a test pilot... it all has to fulfill a child. Immature psyche suffers.
When a child can not be more than was expected of him
The child does not want to do all the waiting times, which is guided by a parent. But the father or mother hired a tutor, trying to get their child succeed in everything, to visit all the clubs and sections, was the best.
Pope after the next martial arts scolds the child, telling him that the skill, the ability to take a punch in the literal and figurative sense - very an important skill for the real man, the only way - by overcoming himself, through the pain, through the "I can not, but it is necessary" and can come to a strong character.
Projection parents why children are not forced to live their lives / istockphoto.com
When a child is credited with negative traits
Words that constantly repeat the parents, complexes, fears and stereotypes adults firmly imprinted into the subconscious of the child and the rest of his life govern his actions. Psychologists call this phenomenon the parent programming or projection.
Do not use destructive phrases that are commonly grown pronounced in severe irritation. Choose the right expression, talking with his son or daughter. After all, the power of parental programming is incredibly high. Try it to be constructive rather than destructive.
Projection parents why children are not forced to live their lives / istockphoto.com
How to grow a happy man
You want your kid grew up to be a successful person? In this case, program it accordingly: build your speech so that inspire a child to new achievements.
It is not necessary to attribute the features of the boy's father or mother girl one parent. For example, a mother and father divorced, and she periodically remembering wife, unreasonably angry at his son. Chastising the boy for another prank, the mother mentions her ex-husband. Not because it is unbearably painful, and because it's easier, it's easier to lose their negativity. And what about the baby. He grows up feeling flawed, destructive, not justify someone's false hopes and expectations.
There is a downside: my mother's compassion, which harms the leader of education, it is not only inappropriate, it is harmful. Boys (and girls - too) do not need to break, trying to train them its like a real man or maid of honor. Breaking, it is impossible to build!
The task of parents - to allow children to develop in the area of interest to them. No need to put the children tasks, which themselves can not or could not fulfill.
Also you will be interested to read: how to raise a child leader
