How many times have you been hurt by the words of others, how often have they tried to shame you, justifying their own cruelty? How many times have you been told embarrassing situations about you, told lies about you, expressed unpleasantly and rudely? Probably not countable. But each time you burst into tears, and were very worried.
I have all the same. Sometimes it seemed to me that absolutely the whole world sees through me, knows that it hurts me from any word and deed from those around me. I felt as if I was unarmed, as if I was constantly among people in the nude. I'm ashamed, I'm hurt, I'm helpless.
Only many years later I understood the definition of my condition and behavior - a highly sensitive person. And this means that my brain simply processes all the information that comes to it at an ultra-deep level.
Here are the signs of a highly sensitive person:
- He notices those details that others pass by him.
- He has very good intuition.
- He is compassionate and too receptive.
- He is an empath, and is able to determine when the interlocutor is feeling bad.
- He quickly gets tired in a large company of people.
- He constantly analyzes what people say and do.
- He accepts criticism and judgment from those around him as truth.
- He does not respect himself and his own needs.
- He doesn't know how to set boundaries.
- He takes on other people's problems and tries to solve them.
Now I have learned to cope with my high sensitivity. Although I am not an expert, I have come a long way and have suffered a lot, so I think that I can give advice to those who, like me, are afraid of criticism and condemnation from the outside.
Now I began to take care of myself, I respect myself and my own needs, and I really began to worry a lot less about what they think or say about me.
Yes, I walk a lot, meditate, take a long bath - this is part of the very practice of calming my hypersensitivity. But there are also some lessons in my head that I always remember when it hits me again.
Here are my tips if you are depressed:
- You will not be able to remove someone else's pain, and if you could, then a person would not be able to develop later.
- You don't have to solve other people's problems. Limit yourself to listening, stop if you have crossed your boundaries.
- You should not hang around in a noisy company, if you feel uncomfortable there, do not force yourself. You are not strange if you prefer to do something else.
- You don't have to do things that make you emotionally stressed.
- We must listen to our own instincts, and not to our experiences. If you want to leave, but you are worried about how others will react to it, listen to yourself, to your desires.
- Learn to set boundaries.
- Selfishness and self-care are two different things.
- To make it easier to cope with everything that happens, you need to get good sleep.
Here are my tips if you're ashamed:
- You are a very highly sensitive person, accept that. Therefore, it is difficult for you to stop living emotions too deeply.
- Sensitivity is not a weakness. On the contrary, this is your strength, because you know how to show compassion, understand people, are open to them.
- You are not sick! You are normal! And you deserve to be respected and loved.
- There are approximately 20% of highly sensitive people on the planet.
- You don't deserve to be shamed for being highly sensitive.
- Tears are nothing to be ashamed of. On the contrary, tears help to calm down and reduce stress levels.
- Try to subdue your shame, otherwise it will consume you. But in the end, like any emotion, your shame will evaporate.
Here are my tips if you are judged and criticized:
- People will always criticize. If one criticizes you, there will be another who will praise, love, appreciate.
- You don't have to act in a way that pleases everyone.
- It doesn't matter what others think of you, that's their business.
- If someone does not appreciate you, then they lose the opportunity to build a real deep relationship.
- If the interlocutor humiliates you, end the conversation with him.
- If a person hurts you, break off the relationship with him.
- If you are condemned, this does not mean that these words are true.
The world lacks highly sensitive people, because there is so much evil, bitterness and apathy around...
The original article is posted here: https://kabluk.me/psihologija/sovety-ljudyam-s-vysokoj-chuvstvitelnostju.html
