It is very unpleasant when you love a person, trust him completely, worry about him, help with some problems, and as a result, it turns out that he is just using you. You can face this in love, friendship, as well as in family ties. And it often happens that the people who use us actually love us. But they are just like that ...
Let's find out about the signs that tell you that close people use you, manipulate you. The sooner you know about it, the better for you. No one should be allowed to treat them this way!
Signs your loved one is using you
You have to live as he dictates to you. He turns everything upside down and upside down so that it is comfortable for him to exist, but you are comfortable only occasionally.
You began to notice that the person close to you treats you well only in those cases when he needs something from you. For example, a friend becomes attentive and caring when he needs help solving a problem, mom starts to worry about you when she needs money for something. I do not argue that you need to help your friends, and even with my mother, the example seems common, but my mother is sacred. But, if the rest of the time these people are indifferent to you, it's time to draw conclusions!
You have to fulfill certain requirements and requests of a person on an ongoing basis. And you have no right to refuse. You should, period.
But your requests, you guessed it, go unheeded at all. You may even be fed with promises, but in the end, you get nothing.
The person close to you tries to manipulate your feelings of guilt so that you do exactly as it will be convenient and comfortable for him. He can deliberately evoke pity, put pressure on the patient, just to get what he wants.
This person wants to be the only one in the whole world for you. He is constantly trying to erase all others from your life. This can be done by a partner, close friend, or girlfriend. And there are a lot of examples when, again, a mother tries to put herself in the most important place, not even letting her child build relationships or communicate with friends. This is also wrong, this is manipulation and use of you!
You are already afraid to deny something to a person. Because he does not understand or perceive any refusals at all. As soon as you say no to him, he starts to "boil", pours a ton of negativity on you, starts a quarrel. Again, you begin to feel guilty about your behavior.
A person constantly expects sympathy, help from you, expects support from you - material or moral, and maybe some kind of assistance in business. But he himself never supports you in anything. No, there are times that support from him comes, but you need to be more careful, because perhaps he has some benefit from this. For example, he can listen with enthusiasm about your problem, give advice, and then suddenly switch to some of his own affairs and demand your help. Or he generally openly refuses to listen to you, because he always has no time or your problems, as he himself says, some trifle and nonsense!
Learn to identify when people are using you. I understand that, for example, when it comes to long-term friendship, long-term relationships or family ties, it is very difficult to take and stop communicating with a person. But maybe it's worth just discussing everything with him, setting clear boundaries, not allowing them to be crossed, and not giving yourself the slack in this regard?
The original article is posted here: https://kabluk.me/psihologija/8-priznakov-togo-chto-blizkie-vam-ljudi-prosto-vas-ispolzujut-i-luchshe-uznat-ob-etom-kak-mozhno-ranshe.html
