In one psychological study, a large number of married couples were interviewed. They were asked only one question: "How can they distribute their household chores on a percentage basis?" The answers were different, 80 to 20, 50 to 50, etc. But, according to experts, the correct answer should have been - 100 to 0! And only a few answered so.
Yes exactly. Psychologists say that each person in a couple should make every effort and not expect anything in return from their partner. And only in this case, everything in the relationship will be fine. But is this really what happens in reality? Usually one expects something from the other, and these unjustified expectations spoil everything. You need to stop waiting for something, but just give, do, then everything will be fine. Otherwise, you can say that you have an unhealthy relationship!
Here are signs that your relationship is unhealthy.
Feelings of possessiveness
You need to feel a fine line between jealousy, protection, the desire for a person to be there, as well as an attempt to control a partner. It all starts with simple questions like, "where are you?", "Why didn't you pick up the phone?", "Who are you with?" Even if you make excuses for your behavior by arguing that you just love and worry about your partner, this is still an unhealthy relationship.
A cross on personal happiness and development
Acceptance and support are important in a healthy relationship. If you have to put an end to personal happiness and self-development for the sake of your loved one, if your partner does not support your dreams and goals, then this is wrong. You will never be a happy person if you start sacrificing something for the sake of the relationship.
Insulation
What a popular word in our time. But now we are talking about something else. The point is that you rarely see your loved ones. And this is not your decision, your partner wants it. He is against you spending time with them, and even indicates some specific personalities. This is definitely an unhealthy relationship. For example, your partner offers you a choice - either a friend of yours or he. Or he instills in you a negative attitude towards someone close to you. You do not need to distance yourself from people who are close to you, it is better to distance yourself from the one who makes you do it.
Breakdowns and screams
A healthy relationship, of course, does not imply that there will always be an idyll between you and your partner, no arguments and showdowns. All this should be, because you are different people with your own separate opinion. That is, the point is not in the absence of conflicts, but in how you solve them. Insults, scandals, screams - these are all unacceptable. If you don't succeed otherwise, then you are definitely in an unhealthy relationship!
Guilt
You don’t have to make your partner happy, it’s not your responsibility, nor is it your partner’s responsibility to make you happy. If he began to instill in you a feeling of guilt for the fact that you are doing something not the way he would like him, then this is complete disrespect. And without this, the relationship cannot be considered healthy.
Impermanence
Another sign of an unhealthy relationship, when partners, for example, converge, then diverge, then confess to a friend to a friend in love, then they are rude and insult each other, then they mow, then they apologize and promise not to commit similar mistakes. Such relationships are fickle and inconsistent, and you should not expect that they can lead to something good.
Dependence
Any dependence on a partner, be it financial, psychological or emotional, is an unhealthy relationship. Your couple should be a team that is always at the same time. You must understand, support, respect each other, but at the same time you must grow as a person, have a certain independence and maintain your own individuality.
Unhealthy relationships cannot be cured, you just need to leave them!
The original article is posted here: https://kabluk.me/psihologija/7-priznakov-togo-chto-vashi-otnosheniya-nezdorovye.html
