Yes, we all love our parents, grandparents, we are grateful to them for life, for the fact that we were brought up and raised, but there is a limit to everything. There is a limit to any human patience. After all, we really have to endure a lot when communicating with the older generation, despite all the respect for them.
There are 4 rules that you need to adhere to when dealing with older people in order not to lose self-control, presence of mind and composure.
No tuning
You will not be able to change, “improve”, convince the elderly people. They have their own established views on absolutely everything, their habits, life principles. Don't try to upgrade them! Even if the habits of your elderly parents become annoying, you still cannot change anything. Firstly, the old people have no desire for this, and secondly, they themselves are already unchangeable. So is it worth spending so much energy and nerves on “improving” the elderly? It's useless!
Have an armor
Yes, if you are constantly in touch with the elderly, it's time for you to get some armor. It should be such a cynical scale that will allow you to minimize your personal losses, preserve your strength and health. You need to keep a certain distance if you want to help the elderly.
Do not be afraid of shallow communication, it is important not to hurt yourself when helping the elderly. Avoid topics that hurt you or are simply emotionally difficult. If this is not possible, then just keep your distance as best you can. And you don't have to defend your point of view, you still won't prove anything. Change the theme and that's it! If you cannot avoid unpleasant topics, and you still get hurt, do not show it, otherwise, no matter how strange it sounds, you will be “finished off”.
Boomerang
There will be a tricky boomerang here. Look, all the negativity that comes from the old people, in the form of moralizing, insults, grief, you just quickly change from a minus sign to a plus sign, and send them back with positive energy.
It probably sounds complicated, but it's much easier to do. Understand, old people are different, they do not understand what you understand, they do not agree with what you agree with, they consider themselves the most intelligent, experienced. But in fact, you are not facing an aggressive opponent and a very cunning opponent, but a helpless sick person. It is difficult to respond to the aggression of old people with hugs and kind words, but it is difficult only in the first seconds. Therefore, so to speak, we received another portion of the negative, endured, and gave back the positive. Translate the topic to another, laugh, joke, do not give in, but remove an unpleasant situation.
Commandment
Yes, this is not so much a rule as a real commandment. A laughing old man is not dangerous! With the help of absolutely any joke, you can dilute even the difficult situation that arises when communicating with old people. Tell funny stories, anecdotes, let all this be always at the ready, like a secret weapon.
How do you like this story?
The grandson is looking at his grandfather's photo album and asks:
- Grandpa, you are such a gentleman with us, but why are you sitting in this photo, and grandma is standing?
- Oh, granddaughter, - says the grandfather, - you see, they thought of photographing us the next morning after the wedding, and at that moment I simply could not stand, and your grandmother could sit!
If you think that laughter in communicating with your old people is not important at all, then you definitely do not understand anything in this life. It is a joke that is a great way to get out of any situation without conflict. And, oddly enough, sometimes rude jokes work much better, the old people like them more.
Do not forget that sooner or later we will all become old people, so be kind to your elderly parents, grandparents, joke more, bring their negative energy back into positive energy, keep your distance and just show love!
The original article is posted here: https://kabluk.me/psihologija/4-pravila-kotoryh-stoit-priderzhivatsya-pri-obshhenii-s-pozhilymi-ljudmi.html
