Why do little kids say no all the time?

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The favorite word of children 2-4 years old is "no". Why is that?

Two-year-olds argue with parents about 20 times an hour. And this is not an exaggeration, but real research results.

Of course, it is difficult for parents to endure such every minute discussions on any occasion. However, for young children insisting on their own, arguing with their parents and a total "no" is absolutely normal.

But what to do to minimize these disputes a little and keep the parents' strength and nerves?

1. Formulate your requests in a positive way

You've probably heard the theory that the brain (including a child's) does not perceive a particle of "not" - and when you say "don't," the child just hears "do." This is especially true for toddlers. The more prohibitions and expressions with "not" on your part - the more resistance there will be from the kid. And he will definitely do exactly what you just banned. Therefore, you need to follow your wording. We say "please sit down at the table so that your beautiful dress remains clean", and not "do not sit on the floor, do not stain your dress."

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2. Explain your requirements

Putting sandals on the street in winter is not just "impossible", but because of this, your feet will freeze, your toes will hurt, you can get sick and stay at home with a fever to drink medicine instead of games and fun.

At 1.5 years old, the child, of course, will not understand, and will have to go through an explosion of crying, but at 2.5 - 3 years, any prohibition can be explained at a level accessible to the child.

Three-year-olds like to memorize these explanations and then "retell" in their own way, teaching, in turn, adults.

3. Let's have a limited choice

If the parent makes all decisions for the child, this is a direct path to child rebellion. Provide controlled choices, such as what to eat or what to wear.

It's good to have 2-3 options, not more. Otherwise, the baby can become so immersed in the choice that the case will be significantly delayed.

4. Show an example

The child does not want to wear a hat, if the parents are without hats, does not want to eat broccoli, if there is pizza in the parents' plates. The more equal your conditions, the sooner the child will follow your example and will not argue.

5. Encourage good behavior

Show your child that you notice good behavior, not just bad behavior. The encouragement should be non-material - hugs, warm words.

Usually, when a child is very mischievous, they try to persuade him with the help of promises of sweets or entertainment. This creates a stable association: "I say no - I get a reward, the worse I behave, the more sweet."

But if a child behaves well, then very few people pay attention to this. It should be the other way around: the better the behavior, the more intangible reward. And it's not worth making food a reward for behavior at all, so that the child does not have eating disorders.

You will also be interested to read:

  • Why does the child whine and how to help him
  • 10 things kids really want from us
  • How to instill discipline in a child and not injure his psyche
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