Introvert: 10 Rules Parents Should Remember

Introverted children usually inherit this quality from one of the parents. It rarely happens that both the mom and dad of an introvert are themselves extroverts.

At the same time, it may seem to the parent, to whom the child does not resemble in character, that something is wrong with his child.

Closure, loneliness, dislike of socializing and fun games - these can actually be symptoms of both physical and psychological problems. But if a child is healthy, he has an appetite, he smiles, is satisfied with his condition and happy to be alone - then this is just a property of his character.

What should the parents of an introverted child remember in order to live in peace and harmony with him?

1. It's okay to be introverted

Not less normal than an extrovert.

Someone is more sociable, someone less, not everyone needs a crowd of friends, there is nothing wrong with being shy.

With age and with the right approach to upbringing, the child is more and more socialized and often loses the very obvious features of an introvert. He communicates more actively, expresses more emotions, often in the company of others.

2. Introvert is forever

A person is initially born either an introvert or an extrovert. Sometimes an introvert can be talkative and sociable, and an extrovert can be sad on the sidelines, but after in a short time everything returns to normal, the temperament manifests itself again, because it is the basis personality.

This is a conditional foundation: if it has a certain size / shape, then whatever you build on top, the foundation will be the same.

3. The child does not suffer, he does not need to be saved

You can understand the desire of parents who push the child to communicate with other children, try to attach him to some collectives, amateur performances, and educate him as a team player.

All this is really necessary and useful, but you cannot force an introvert by force, this does not motivate him.

If a child likes to sit alone and read a book, put jigsaw puzzles, sort out some toys - everything is fine with him. He can become sad, reflexive, think about something for himself, invent, make imaginary friends - all this is absolutely normal.

Of course, the task of parents is to show that the world is not limited to the room and talking to books. Introverts are good (albeit partially) when traveling, this is also worth remembering.

4. It is easy for an introvert to communicate with one person and difficult with a team.

In fact, introverts have good communication skills. If the introverted child is basically inclined to talk or socialize - or the situation contributes to this (came to kindergarten, school, guests), then he can easily maintain a conversation with one, even a stranger, human.

It is more difficult when a child finds himself in a team where he does not know many. For example, I came to a section or first grade.

It is difficult for an introvert to perceive a lot of new people at once: he studies each new person and observes him in order to understand whether it is worth opening up to him, whether it is a friend or an enemy.

Accordingly, when there are a lot of people at once, the child is lost and withdrawn, prefers to just watch everything from the outside and not communicate with anyone.

5. Introverts get tired of communication easily

Especially if they communicate with very explicit extroverts, it takes a lot of their energy. It is very difficult for children when they are "chirping" around them, constantly telling something, pulling somewhere, asking something. Therefore, introverts prefer to "dose" communication with peers.

If the child is young and you see that he is already tired of the energy of other children, help him get out of this situation and be a little alone.

6. Making friends is hard for introverts

Usually they try to start all relationships - both friendly and romantic - once and for all. Yes, since childhood.

It's hard for an introvert to make friends with someone, but if he has already opened up, he hopes that this friendship will be forever.

7. An introvert has a hard time conflict

As mentioned above, if an introvert starts a relationship, he takes it very seriously. But you know what friendship and love are in childhood and adolescence?

Today I am friends - tomorrow I am not friends, today I love - tomorrow I do not. Today I have such a best friend, tomorrow - different. Today this boy flirts with me, and tomorrow - with another.

But all this is not about the introvert. For him, this is a real betrayal, if they suddenly turn away from him, if they gossip about him, weave intrigues. The introvert himself does not do this and it is very difficult to endure such situations.

It is important for parents to be understanding and not discount the introverted child's problems. Be empathetic and understanding and don't use the phrase "How many more will there be" - for an introvert, there probably won't be that many "of them".

8. An introvert's communication with other children should be encouraged carefully.

If at some holiday, for example, your child met other children and had a good time, this is not means that next time you need to push him in the back with the words "Come on, come on, do not play the fool, I know you can communicate. "

Tell your introverted child something like, "I thought you weren't going to like it, but look how great you played." But be prepared that the child will not become very sociable from this day on.

9. Introvert likes to be alone

This quality especially upsets parents when they arrange a noisy and cheerful birthday for the child, and in response the child closes up, cries - and as a result, the holiday is ruined for everyone.

Discuss in advance with the child how he would like to celebrate his birthday, suggest options, among which he will choose the appropriate one.

Do not be offended by an introvert if, instead of a family dinner, he wants to sit alone, and on a joint walk he will constantly lag behind and walk separately.

10. Be proud of your child

An introvert is really cool. They often think that they are talking, do not throw words to the wind, do not start empty fleeting acquaintances, do not connect with dubious companies, keep their word, are very responsible, respect other people's boundaries, are attentive, sensitive.

They really know how to love and be friends - and usually understand you better than you understand them.

You will also be interested to read:

• 7 benefits of dating an introvert
• shyness in children: where it comes from and how to fight
• 5 tips for raising an optimistic child