Educate alcoholic 4 parental errors that are formed depending

Why does a person starts drinking? Narcologists say that the reasons lie in his childhood. And not necessarily in the family consume alcohol, can be simply authoritarian parents who suppress the child. Or make these mistakes education.

Not to contain emotions baby

What is the psychological container: it is the ability to make their emotions and feelings of another person. The child has a small container. He just can not cope with their emotions, do not know how to control them. And here it is important to close was an adult who will help skonteynirovat emotions.

How to do it correctly?

The child fled. At that time my mother asked to be careful. But the kid tripped and tore my knees up blood. Mom with good container will embrace the baby, say comforting words, and asks to be careful. Mum with a small container can not cope with their own emotions of fear for the child, she throws them to the child. This is manifested in the cries and the classic, "I told you not to run! Himself to blame! "

The child needs a good parent container, using it he will learn to experience their feelings. If the container is little the parents, if they have a child and dumped on their emotions, he does not learn to adequately cope with their experiences. In adult life, he begins to run away from them with the help of alcohol.

Inability to say a firm "no"

This forms the child's inability to withstand the frustration - the stress that we experience when we want something, but you can not.

Children often react to restrictions that attempt to influence the views of parents. Mom says no, then the child starts crying, capricious and mother give up - just not screaming.

A child reads a ban like this: if I can not, but really want, you can.

Dependent people are not able to withstand frustration. The child, who also does not know how to do it, is prone to addiction.

Changeling reality

The words and actions of parents disagree. Parents smoke, but tell your child about the dangers of smoking. They say they need to cross the road only at a pedestrian crossing, but sometimes can run across it with your child. Either they all show that they are - intelligent people, but they break the rules: children beaten, drive drunk driving, take bribes, etc.

Ignoring problems. The child complains, and the parents do not take him. Or dismiss his problems. And violence, but the parents may take place in the family does not solve the problem, and show everyone that they have everything well.

False optimism. The man does not try to see the problem and assure yourself that all is well now he has. Optimism - it's not bad, but not when, instead of solving the problem, the person is engaged in a self-suggestion.

Popularity child. The child is the smartest in the school, he had influential parents, he starred in commercials, so popular. In the case of a child's popularity parents need to be extremely cautious in education because the child is not aware of who he really is and dependencies increase risks.

Giperkonrol parents

As a child, the child learns self-control skills. This is a very important skill, which often do not have people with addictions. But it is easy to suppress. Make it your parents hypercontrol.

At first, everything is decided by the parents of the child. But the kid grows up and he gradually transfer the right to self-control. Parents easier to do everything yourself. children's skillsAutonomy is not formed, all the more that parents supervise. So a person would be an external control, but there will be internal, as a first step toward addiction.

You will also be interested to know 10 phrases that hinder the process of education and traumatized children.