The car broke down, there is not enough money, there is no luck in love, the boss is spreading rot, the children do not obey, the neighbors do not allow sleep, everything is bad, everything is terrible, everything unbearable... Millions of people around the world are used to complaining to others about their problems before or even instead of solving them! Of course, you always want to help a loved one, but every day listening to complaints is harmful! Yes, you heard right, being a pillow for tears in extremely difficult situations and occasionally is possible, but when this becomes a habit, then such a situation causes a person enormous harm!
Why can't you listen to complaints?
Well, it would seem, what is it about once again lending your shoulder to a friend, work colleague or sister? Moreover, politeness does not allow us to take and turn away from a person when he feels bad. But there is a limit to everything!
The universe adjusts to people who are constantly crying, and all far-fetched, even very small problems they turn into more serious ones. A person says that he is a failure, and because of this, even more problems and failures are attached to him. And each time the mourner has more and more reasons to complain, moan, and get support.
And what do other people's complaints threaten you?
You are losing vital energy
She herself noticed that, as soon as I meet one of my acquaintances, who always has everything wrong, there are always some problems, and failures throughout my life, so I feel then exhausted. I feel tired, wrung out like a lemon, even my head starts to ache. And all my plans go down the drain. It's just that other people's complaints draw out all the energy, and attract negativity to the person. You listened to everything, so you were poured with a bucket of mud.
You are being manipulated
There are also types of complainants who manipulate people with their tears. They do it for some selfish purposes. They make you feel guilty, that you feel embarrassed that everything is bad with them, and you, such a scoundrel, everything is fine. As a result, you will begin to offer your help, support, and to the detriment of yourself. Sound familiar?
Deterioration of the emotional state
We heard about how everything is so bad and unsuccessful for someone, and everything, the mood is at zero, everything around enrages, some negative thoughts come into my head. Sometimes a person begins to think that now he will refuse help, and then he will fly in like a boomerang, and someday he will also find himself in a difficult situation, and there will be no one to help. Fatigue, emotional imbalance, brain damage ...
Changing outlook on life
Complainers can change the outlook of even a true optimist! A person who constantly listens to complaints, begins to look at the world around through dark glasses, stops noticing the good, becomes suspicious and eventually turns into a whiner.
So what do you do?
Pull yourself together! Don't be afraid of the boomerang. You can help and listen, but you should know the sense of proportion. You yourself allow the person to throw out his negativity on yourself. Say "STOP", take your politeness away, learn to ignore the complainant. So you will save yourself, and you can change a person who is constantly dissatisfied with everyone and everyone!
Advice
- communicate less with complainants;
- tell them that they should be problem solving, not complaining;
- do not be afraid to say that this does not concern you;
- less sympathy and offers of help;
- stop letting other people's problems through yourself;
- set personal boundaries, don't let the complainer ruin your mood with whining.
Understand that you cannot make everyone around you happy and help everyone. If you are soft and friendly with everyone, then those around you will merge their negativity on you, and soon your soul will become like a garbage dump, which is overflowing with strangers problems.
Your life is more important than the complaints and problems of others! Take care of yourself, love yourself, ignore the eternal sufferers! This is the only way your life will become happier and brighter!
Read also: 7 conditions of your nails that can indicate a problem in the body
The original article is posted here: https://kabluk.me/psihologija/4-prichiny-pochemu-nelzya-slushat-chuzhie-zhaloby.html
