Every parent almost daily have to deal with the fact that the child refuses to fulfill any requests and assignments. In this case, all parents have a standard set of phrases, do not really have any effect on obedience, and sometimes even cause the exact opposite effect.
First, the child, like every adult has the right to discontent and bad mood. And this, too, must be considered. Secondly, everyone knows that courtesy and respect to the man - one of the best ways to achieve the desired result. However, many adults often forget about this, communicating with their children. Thirdly, it should be noted that while children see the world a little differently than adults, so the phrase applied to them, should be told a little differently.
Site Kolobok.uaI picked up a few simple everyday phrases that after a brief interpretation will affect the crumbs much convincing, and your relationship will become much stronger and friendlier.
"As soon as you gather your toys, we will be able to check out your favorite fairy tale"instead "If you do not immediately gather their toys, I tell you, too, nothing will not read."
The child is much more pleasant to hear, what a pleasant time waiting for him after the work done than to hear a direct threat and coercion, after which automatically eliminates any desire anything do.
"What are you going to wear pajamas you today - with elephant or a dog?" instead "Quickly go to sleep, you get up early tomorrow."
In dealing with a child, many psychologists recommend the use of sales techniques, as persuasion and sales have substantially the same basis. That is, the child is given the choice without a choice. He proposed "job" and the choice of two options.
Variations can be mass and every situation can be offered to the child two choices. "On what subject you want to start to do their homework - with math or reading?" Rather than "immediately sit down to do their homework." "You want to wear a shirt or a jacket?" Instead of "Come fast to assemble, we're late." It is necessary to think in advance a few sentences, or at the right time may not be enough for this fantasy, or come to the fore emotions. As they get older, "formula" will complicate things, but by the time you have turned into ace.
"Something I'd forgotten what I asked you five minutes ago?" instead "What are you, again folded his things? I asked you 20 times. "
With many kids can play in a kind of sclerosis. Thanks to your game, the child himself recalled his job and execute it with great interest.
"I'd forgotten how people brush their teeth" instead "What are you, again I forgot to brush your teeth?".
Children perceive the world through play, so play with them as often as possible, even when it is necessary to perform such an important action like brushing your teeth. Not every adult wants to do it, and the child, and even more so. Take it and start to clean the eye or brow brush. The child will not only be fun, but also will be of interest brush your teeth, And even my mother teach. How is it interesting!
"You asked me - I'll answer" instead "I'm tired of repeating a hundred times the same thing, I said-no"
When a child is trying once again to beg to buy him a toy or sit five more in minutochek phone, in this case, negotiate with him is endless, and it threatens to end in scandal and punishment. To prevent this from happening every time, at the right moment you must say calm tone: "No".
In the subsequent whining "? Why not" should continue even voice replied: "You asked me - I'll answer." All your subsequent arguments are useless. The child simply checks the limits of your patience. Here you are, knowing this, keep your strategy. Yes, the child has the right to whine, and their discontent, but he must know that Mom and Dad major, which means that the last word on them.
"Let's think together how to solve this problem"instead "Stop whining!"
Usually, when a child is upset about something, many adults think that the situation is not so terrible indeed. But it only seems. For remains forgotten in the street trinket - a loss of universal scale. Therefore, first of all, try to understand the essence of the problem, given that it is really important for your restless, and secondly, ask him: "Let's think together how to solve this problem," or ask, "What do you think is the biggest problem or small?".
Your toddler will be sure exactly what you do with it at the same time, and then the trouble is not so universal, because Mom and Dad are everything. So the child is thinking to a certain age in the future and change the scheme if the child says, "I can not do this math ", then we can apply the phrase:" You just have not found a way how to solve this problem, but you sure this handle. " Thus, you continue to inspire hope in the power of their baby, while not directly help him, but was still close.
"Let's try to fix it"instead "Immediately apologize"
Many children are taught to apologize to the first exit in the sandbox, but many kids do not even realize yet the meaning of the word. Courtesy of the child is very important for parents. But the standard "sorry" does not always teach the child responsiveness and empathy.
Much more productive is to teach the child to correct the current situation in order to help the man whom he had offended. If crumb broke someone's sand castle, offer not just apologize, but to help build a new one. If it turned out that the child pushed the other kid, and he broke his knee, then suggested we go home together and bring the victim to the antiseptic wool. Thus, you definitely learn not just regret it the act, but also to empathize with the other person.
Each child needs a personal approach, but the most important thing is love and respect for him as a person!
Also be sure to ask abouthow to bring up her son, 5 important rules