The way we raise our children in the future affect them in adulthood. So it's worth a closer approach to their education, to avoid common mistakes.
Do not refuse to communicate
You should always be available for dialogue with your child. That is, you have to communicate with the child or when it is convenient and when it is convenient to him. Do not hurry, do not pretend to listen, but in reality closely aware that you child wants to convey what his problem to this conversation was not just for show, and present. If you like to speak phrases from clever books, it must conform to what you have said, that words do not contradict actions. It is also important to never start a conversation with a child with negativity or aggression.
Do not refuse to listen
When listening to your child, try to look him in the eye. No need to cross your legs and arms, it will be considered a teenager as your greatness on him. Try to communicate on an equal footing. And turn off the TV, computer, mobile phone, so that external stimuli do not interrupt your conversation. In no case do not interrupt the child listen to his thoughts completely. And not just pretend, but really try to feel the problems of adolescents.
Do not skimp on the sympathy
We, adults, children's problems sometimes seem so silly and unimportant. While for the adolescents themselves banal quarrel with a friend is sometimes the end of the world. Therefore, if the child shares with you their feelings, do not simply listen to him, but also to show compassion.
Do not choose to talk to a crowded place
Try to keep you and your child were left alone, before starting a serious conversation with him. By the way, this applies if your conversation will be personal, or you want to express their dissatisfaction. But if you need to praise the teenager, on the contrary, it is necessary to do it in public.
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Do not ignore your own "I"
Here it is that sometimes the teenager begins to really feel ashamed or embarrassed of their feelings or behavior. Therefore, you should open up to him, saying the phrase "I feel ..." "I feel ..." etc. Explain to your child that life can place and other more difficult moments, so you should learn to cope with everything going on, while not being ashamed of their feelings.
Do not refuse to come to a common agreement
It is impossible to talk after, the final word was for you. You should come to a common agreement that satisfies both of you. It is necessary to recognize the fact that not only the child can not be right, but you are.
Do not forget the reward
Of course, do not abuse it, and, for example, as do many parents of teenagers, the mark of "5" to give money, but for the general unsatisfactory to deprive pocket expenses. It is important to feel bound. Just praise your child assess his efforts, aid, etc.
Do not tune into negative
No matter how you were upset and even angry at your child, do not set yourself in advance on the negative. It should make it a rule that even if the conversation with a teenager to be not very pleasant subject, it is necessary in any case to try to achieve reconciliation.
Not all parents think about their actions and proper upbringing. Many people believe that if you give the child home, food, clothing, then they can already be considered as good parents. But a good parent, first of all, to be a child friend who will always help, put her arm, listen and regret.
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