Today's conversation I would like to begin with a parable. The man turns to God: "Lord, I'm so hard to bear his cross, can I choose to itself other?" God shows his crosses and He says: "Choose the" duty of man to choose among different and focused on the small and lightweight, "Can I have this cross currently I take? ". The Lord replied: "It is certainly possible, but it is your cross!"
What I want to say that? What every man his share falls only those trials that he was able to endure! And if you happen so that you are left alone with a child in her arms, in any case, not lower them! My mother was left alone with two small children when the father left her for another woman. To my brother I was five years old and two years. It was hard, no one denies. And especially because mom dad loved.
For a time, until we grew up alone with my mother, it was a lot that we as luck would have hurt one another; running around in the freezing cold in an autumn coat - not enough money in the winter; Then began a period of disintegration of the USSR and perestroika, which, certainly, is remembered by many because of shortages and absolute, literally embracing, depression at all.
But my mother did not give up. She struggled with the difficulties of bringing up our love and respect. Father, we replaced my wonderful grandfather. Of course, she had another love, but remained a top priority for her children.
There is another example. Familiar dating a guy. She became pregnant by him. He left. More precisely, they parted, and only after she learned of her pregnancy. Speak mountain-father did not, she gave birth. She helped her mother. It is clear that it was hard, but she coped and then found a new love. Now they are all united family live in another country and enjoy happiness.
Girls, I repeat, do not be discouraged - it's the most important thing! In no case does not terminate the life of a small miracle that already lives within you! It is really a miracle! Many couples dream of children for years... Look at the situation from the other side: the baby's father left you? And good! You such an irresponsible person is not needed! You - a strong, smart and beautiful! You can do it!
Pregnancy - like litmus shows who is actually the closest person to you. There can not be such that you no one could help in taking care of the baby. In addition, the trust, the child - is a powerful motivation. You have opened a second wind, you find yourself in such hidden reserves, about which even think at other times it was impossible! Someone becomes a brilliant fashion designer, someone starts writing books that are selling like hot cakes. Most importantly, it would wish!
And about a life partner... First, let go of the past, forget the insults. Start a new leaf. If you find my love, talk to them frankly. Do not hide that child educate herself. If a man loves you, and will love your baby.
Be sure to take care of yourself. You have, no matter what, must always be a haircut or just a beautiful well-groomed hair, manicure, make-up, clothes that suit you. Walk down the street with confidence, with a flat back, a beautiful gait. And again, carefully look around. Sometimes the people you really need are long is near you and around the supports.
Do not close your heart. As much as it hurt not. But at the same time remember: A single woman look "different." Do not place a priority in order to find a partner and children - father. Men see it. Just live and enjoy life. With a smile and a slight curiosity meet each new day. Find positive in every moment spent with the baby. Try to raise a child, so that he did not feel slighted. Yes, he is not there a father, but it should not become a reason for loneliness or feelings of inferiority. Do not let other children make fun of a child just because of the fact that he has no father. Replace his mother and father. Learn to protect themselves, to fight back the offenders.
One of the abandoned children by their fathers problems - lack of confidence: "If Dad left me, then I am guilty." Reassure your baby in reverse. No one is to blame for what happened, and the more he is. Just the way life is. Try as much as possible to tell that his dad (baby) loves or would have loved, if he knew about it, that would be proud of the achievements of their child.
If, nevertheless, the father of the child has a desire to meet with the child, Forbid him not. The pope, too, has the right to communicate, do not forget about it, no matter how hurt you. You should always be aware of: all the problems and issues associated with the baby, you will solve itself. And if you are not afraid (and it should not scare!), Go to your goal, not paying attention to the obstacles!
But at the same time, never forget that you are a woman! Sometimes you have to give yourself the opportunity to relax, to feel weak and vulnerable. If you behave with your prospective husband as a woman, it is anywhere from you will not go away. Give your man feel that you need it, rather than, "Well, Misha, I myself will score the nail!"
