We grew up without the Internet, we didn’t call each other before we went for a walk, teachers didn’t write any requests in parent chats, and parents couldn’t call us when we were late at home. To ask a task after skipping school, we went to a classmate's house, we were taught to be independent from the cradle, we always ate everything, we had a regime, and we were punished. It is now divorced a bunch of psychologists who claim that each of us has childhood trauma due to such upbringing. But we recall our childhood years with tenderness and delight, realizing that our children will not have this... Yes, something was strange, and maybe wrong. But it was like that for everyone, and we still love our parents madly, and we thank them for our childhood!
There was no co-sleeping. Now young parents sleep with their children almost until graduation. And our parents taught us that parents sleep separately, and children separately, and there were no indulgences.
We were taught to be independent. We ourselves went to school and back, could cook our own meals even in the first grade, cleaned the house while our parents worked, and even looked after our younger sisters and brothers. We did the lessons ourselves, we also signed up for circles and sections ourselves. And sometimes I had to stomp to the other end of the city for embroidery, knitting, dancing or football. They did everything themselves. Now everything is decided by phone, if parents cannot meet the child from school, take him to a circle or sit with him at home, grandparents are connected. We also played by ourselves. Of course, because now life has become much more dangerous than before.
Left-handers were retrained to right-handers. It always seemed so stupid to me, but before, indeed, children were almost tied to the left hand to the body, so that they would not try to write with it. I think that it makes no difference with which hand a person does something, the main thing is that he does it well.
We always finished everything because the elders forced us to. Now, if you ate everything, go and walk. They also fed us by the hour. By the way, when the children were babies, I also fed them strictly every 3 hours, because the doctor said so. How much I suffered then, and how much my children suffered...
The boys in my childhood were all with short haircuts, and the girls more often with long hair, bows, bangs. Now it's the other way around. I do not judge, everyone expresses themselves as they want, but it seems to me that before everything was somehow more organized, now schoolchildren have too much freedom.
We were punished. Yes, I also flew with a belt, and more than once during my childhood I defended my allotted time in the corners of the apartment. But at me at once it was postponed as to behave it is impossible. Now try it, put the child in a corner, resentment will immediately begin, and then childhood traumas will surface, and parents will quickly be written down as toxic. But we love our parents, despite the corner and the belt. Previously, even in kindergartens, children were put in a corner, but now they just put them on a high chair, and even then, this does not always work out.
We had a routine. Before school, we slept during the day, went to bed at the same time in the evening, we also had lunch and dinner according to the regimen. Now, if a child does not want to sleep during the day, they do not force him, but if he likes not to sleep until 12 at night, there is nothing to worry about. Well, if he doesn't want borscht or porridge, that's nonsense, then he'll eat some chips.
We rarely used diapers. With my first child, diapers were a rarity for me. The kid was more in diapers, or simply “holoped” on oilcloths. But in a year we have already made friends with the pot. Now diapers have become fashionable, and many mothers put them on their babies up to four years old!
And in my childhood, parents never apologized to their children! And it didn't feel wrong. Modern parents apologize to their children, then explain why they punished them or they shouted at them, and then they also buy some gift as a sign of reconciliation, which I don’t understand.
And what was your childhood like, and what principles of upbringing do you adhere to with your children?
The original article is posted here: https://kabluk.me/psihologija/ranshe-bylo-po-drugomu-chto-bylo-v-nashem-detstve-i-nikogda-ne-proizojdet-v-detstve-nashih-detej-i-vnukov.html
