This is a bitter truth that should not be denied. Not all people marry for love. This is how circumstances develop, there is no time to wait, there is no suitable candidate. There are many reasons, but the result is one.
My friend got married this way. She was already over 30, there were no boyfriends, she didn’t like anyone. And she met on a blind date with a man. She didn’t like him, he was much older than her, and he seemed somehow stupid to her, she didn’t want such a husband for herself.
But parents, girlfriends, colleagues - everyone began to convince her that he was a good man. And she herself is not a young woman to find fault and touch like that. In general, under pressure from others, my friend gave up and began dating that man. She did not feel love for him, and she had never heard such a thing from him, but she agreed to the proposal to marry him.
Then, right before the wedding, she lost her whole mood. She suddenly wanted to get married, but she got out anyway. And this is only a single case, and there are thousands of them around, they are all different, but the meaning is the same.
And because it is very difficult to find someone you love. In our youth, we are sure that it is possible, that everyone in the world has their own soul mate, and we will definitely meet her. But over time, or rather with age, comes the realization that there are a lot of people in the world, and finding the one with whom it will be good is generally not easy.
And some people themselves admit that in their entire lives they have never been able to meet a person for whom they would feel something strong. Because true love is unattainable. To meet her, you will need both courage and desire, as well as the opportunity to get to know people, and luck is also very important.
Yes, the world is too big for two loving hearts to meet without problems. And many want a family so badly, but can't find true love. And they search, search, and then too much time passes, and they choose someone who more or less likes them. It turns out that marriage and love are completely different things.
Ideally, people have a lot in common, start dating, and then get married. But the reality is often very different. At some point, an adult realizes that you can love, but not fit each other. And you can also love, and then understand that feelings overshadowed everything. Not everyone endures the test of time, and therefore they choose for themselves the one with whom it is easier, easier. Because love can be crazy and desperate, but marriage is not, it cannot.
They say around that if you don’t get married before 30, then that’s it, you won’t be needed by anyone. And what does a person have at the age of 20+? The work is unstable, experience is almost zero, there is no maturity. And now everyone around starts to get married, and there is a panic, society puts pressure on someone, relatives on someone. And you have to marry not for love, because you can’t wait for it, but just so that it is. As if marriage is some kind of task in the game, and it must be completed.
Yes, a lot of people live in marriage with the unloved, and for love to start a family is a real blessing! In any case, marriage is a big responsibility. Even if you have love, life will not always be beautiful, and there will be problems, and misunderstandings, and quarrels are also not excluded. And sometimes you realize that love is not the main thing in a relationship, the main thing is respect for each other, kindness.
Remember that you can't always choose who to love, but there is always a chance that you will love who you choose!
The original article is posted here: https://kabluk.me/psihologija/kak-mnogo-ljudej-v-brake-s-neljubimymi.html
