Modern parents are often accused of being childish. Why is this happening? Because they sin with overprotection and absolutely do not know how to spend correctly on their children. It seems to many that children need to be pampered and that they do not understand anything in life until the age of 18. But is it? Of course not!
There are parents who, by their behavior, do not allow their children to grow up. They can be divided into 3 types:
Type one: parents pay for everything
We are talking about those moms and dads who believe that pampering children can and should be. Such people are ready to buy their offspring at the click of something that comes into their heads. They do not even think that this is how they make their children irresponsible. There are guys who do not appreciate the benefits they have. Let's say this is a situation with a phone. They buy a fancy model for a child, but he somehow carelessly handles the thing. He can drop it 10 times a day, he has already scratched the protective glass, throws the phone on the table with a knock. All due to the fact that he does not appreciate these benefits. When the phone stops working or becomes inappropriate, the parents will definitely buy it a new one.
It is this type of parent that does not allow children to grow up. They do not understand how hard money is given, they do not know. How long does it take to work to buy an expensive phone and other things. Mom and Dad always pay for them. And, by the way, there are parents who pay for everything for adult children, and they happily sit on the neck of their ancestors, and already insolently begin to demand their provision.
Type two: parents do not prepare children for the future
Most often, problems arise with financial issues. Yes, teenage children still do not earn and are fully supported by their parents. But, they are also given pocket money, and how to spend it: for what, where, how much - the children themselves must decide. And what about us? A mother up to 18 years old spins sandwiches to her offspring to school, she herself buys snack bars and fruits for him. As a result, the child simply says to the mother: I need it, and the mother decides everything herself.
The money issue is very important. Of course, now we can say that many adults are not trained in financial literacy, in which case, what do we expect from children? But your children need to be taught how to save, spend wisely, explain that you need to buy what you need first, and then satisfy your whims.
Type three: parents do not treat grown-up children like adults
It is, of course, good that you are worried about your child, help him with lessons, are interested in who he communicates with. But you can't turn your concern into overprotectiveness. Such situation. The girl has already celebrated her fourteen year old, but her mother has not loosened her guardian grip. Every time a child comes out from somewhere, he must write to his mother a text message, like: "left", as soon as the child gets to the circles, school or something else, he must write: "I got there." And she will have such a relationship with her mother at the age of 20 and at 30, the mother will control every step of her daughter, and will be aware of what she ate, where she went and whom she saw!
You can ask your child what he wants for dinner and then cook it. You may be wondering how his day went, who he saw, what grades he received. But you don't need to patronize your offspring like a baby! You are only doing him a disservice by not giving even the slightest opportunity to make decisions on your own and grow up in general!
The original article is posted here: https://kabluk.me/psihologija/3-tipa-roditelej-kotorye-ne-dajut-svoim-detyam-povzroslet.html
