The problem of fathers and children is eternal. And no one really knows how to raise a child until he is born. First of all, I would like to draw your increased attention to this. After all, just as you do not know how to raise your child correctly, you are mistaken, learn with him and develop, your parents did not know this. Therefore, most of children's grievances and claims can be avoided, or rather, try to forget about them. Well, what in reality do children never forgive their parents? We will talk about this now.
I'm not talking about those offenses when, for example, a child asks to buy him an expensive toy, the adult refuses, and the baby is offended. We are talking about those situations that can create a deep rift in the relationship between parents and children even in very early childhood, and completely destroy trust.
In vain, many parents devalue the feelings of their children. Probably, not all adults manage to take seriously the "troubles" of their children. But it seems to us that a trifle is happening, but for a child it can be a real tragedy!
Here are 2 kids' grievances that never say goodbye to their parents
Broken promises
Understand once and for all that you cannot make promises that you will never fulfill, cannot fulfill, or even did not intend to. We ourselves tell our children about this so that they are not unfounded. But why, then, do we demand this from children, while we violate this rule ourselves? Especially bad and destructive are empty promises made in order to comfort the child. “Don’t cry, I’ll buy you this car,” the child calms down, but then it dawns on him that time is passing, and he hasn’t bought a car. But this is only the easiest example, there are even worse!
The child will eventually realize that the promises of the parents do not mean anything at all. Do not think that children are stupid and that your deception will not have any consequences. Throughout their growing up, they learn from us adults, and by our behavior we teach them to behave incorrectly. Better the bitter truth! Believe me, your child may not remember that you punished him for a broken vase or a deuce, but for the fact that you promised him to take a puppy from they didn’t take shelter in the end, because they realized that you don’t need it, they will remember it until your very old age, and maybe even after you are no longer will become!
Disrespectful attitude
This is a problem more than young parents, as well as, on the contrary, older parents. They consider their children to be stupid creatures who do not have the right to vote, there is nothing to talk to them about, therefore, they are disrespectful to them. And you yourself are familiar with such phrases: "grow up - you will understand", "eggs do not teach a chicken", "I lived my life, but you do not understand anything"? If yes, then I sympathize with you, you have a grudge against your parents! Do not treat your child as a lower being, who must obey you in everything and always be silent. This is wrong and insulting! In addition, your child will grow up generally unadapted for adulthood! Or, on the contrary, someday it will rebel, and you will more than drink.
Moreover, children will never respect adults who do not respect them. So start with yourself if you want to be an authority and a friend for your baby in one person, that is, an authoritative friend!
You know, if you find it difficult to forgive your parents, see a psychologist. If you understand that you cannot cope with the child, then your visit to a specialist will not be something to be ashamed of for you. It’s a shame to be a parent whom the children care about. And then you will wonder what happened, "after all, I have for them all my youth, money, health"... But you start digging and it turns out that you yourself are to blame for everything!
The original article is posted here: https://kabluk.me/psihologija/2-veshhi-kotorye-deti-nikogda-ne-prostyat-svoim-roditelyam-dazhe-esli-te-pered-nimi-vsju-zhizn-budut-izvinyatsya.html
