Do you think that the more children - the more problems? Not at all.
However, there are certain problems that should not be underestimated.
1. The only children are more spoiled.
When there is only one child in the family, there is a higher risk that the parents will surround him with overprotection.
The only child is more indulged, amenable to his manipulations, fulfilling any of his wishes and requirements. This is not always the case, but in the vast majority of cases.
If the only child is also late for the parents, all negative moments only intensify.In adulthood, they translate into self-centeredness, lack of empathy, and underdeveloped emotional intelligence.
2. The only child is less socialized.
Having a brother or sister gives the child the opportunity to socialize in a comfortable family atmosphere.
Parents usually underestimate the fact that the child is really bored playing at home alone. It's much more interesting with a brother or sister.You may be afraid of conflicts that happen between children in a family. But in fact, conflict situations, the ability to solve them and the experience they give, further contribute to the child's socialization, the ability to find understanding with other children.
3. The only child is more controlled.
When there are several children, the attention of parents is "diffused". After all, it is spent not only on direct supervision, but also on a wide range of tasks and issues regarding the life of each of the children.
And if there is only one child, then all the thoughts and deeds of the parents, all attention is focused on him alone. Of course, with age it starts to bother him, he wants to get rid of constant attention and control.
4. It is easier for parents with several children.
This is a fact that may be incomprehensible to the parents of an only child. It seems that if one is not easy, then two or three are just a feat.
But the parents of several children will tell you: with each new child, the level of anxiety and anxiety decreases. Mom has more experience and resilience, there is an opportunity to correct past mistakes (and most importantly - knowledge of how do it), she already understands well what is really worth worrying about, and what to close eyes.If parents are often afraid to even leave one child for the night with their grandmother, then parents of two or three children shamelessly go on a trip for two. But the main thing is that they know for sure that children will endure it absolutely normally, and do not feel guilty.
5. It is more difficult for an only child to separate from their parents.
Nature has laid down that upon reaching a certain age, the "cub" must leave the parental "nest" and begin an independent life. This is not just normal, it is a necessary stage in the formation of a separate independent personality.
But if there is only one child in the family, it may be difficult for him to do this because of a sense of guilt towards his parents.
Where does it come from? It is raised by the parents themselves, who overprotect their child, do not allow him to be independent, think and do everything for him, cannot letting go of him, treat him like a little even at 20-30-40 years old, in fact - do not trust and consider not viable without them.There may also be an option that the child moves out from the parents, but continues to be in close psychological dependence on them. This is also a consequence of the manipulative behavior of the parents themselves. The child seems to live separately, but for him, as before, the opinion of mom and dad and their interests are higher than their own, higher than the interests of his new family, etc. This is not a very healthy situation, you must agree.
In a family where two or more children grew up, this is also possible, but more likely if the parents used an arbitrary form of education.
You will also be interested to read:
- 10 things kids really want from us
- how to instill discipline in a child and not injure his psycheb
- crisis 3 years old - how to properly respond to children's whims
