Difficult people can be your relatives or bosses. And you need to be ready to communicate with them.
1. Keep yourself in balance
From a physical point of view, get into a comfortable and stable position in which you feel confident.
Morally - learn to resist if you are provoked by emotions: focus on a specific subject, keep the original goal in mind conversation, think about some events in an hour / day / year that will help you realize the momentary moment that is not worth spending nerves.
2. Tell yourself that you are talking, not fighting.
If the situation allows, it is better to tell your opponent directly. Everyone can throw accusations and unpleasant words at each other, but not everyone can meet halfway by reminding that you want to come to an understanding.
3. Give the person the right to feel
The other person is not obliged to love or respect you, to understand, to compromise. And this is what you need to take for granted, and not your hopes for some other format of communication.4. Give the right to make mistakes
Everyone can be wrong in everything. The main thing is to prove your innocence as calmly, reasonably and civilized as possible. You may not share someone else's opinion, but you shouldn't be dismissive of it.
5. Don't take accusations personally
People can show passive and active aggression. The former play the role of victims, the latter blame others for everything. With the latter, it is important to get away from the conflict in time, not allowing it to flare up.
They will still think of something for you that you did not even think to say and think, but, in any case, you will save your nervous system. If an active aggressor insults and accuses you, you do not need to take it personally and look for a "grain of truth" in this, it is not there.
6. Talk about facts, actions, not personality
Discussing the personality of an emotional tyrant is like jumping into the mouth of a volcano - painful and pointless. Personalization is always the last argument when there is nothing else to cover.
But people with a difficult character can only use such "arguments" to lead you into confusion. Do not follow the lead and keep the conversation within the framework of the facts, without being distracted by outsiders.
If it is no longer possible to do this under the onslaught of the other side, it is better to stop communication immediately.
7. Be polite
Ignoring the presence of a person with whom you find it difficult to communicate, or defiantly leaving is also part of the conflict. You need to try to keep yourself in hand and greet and say goodbye as politely and calmly as possible, adhere to a neutral tone and follow the facial expressions that can easily betray dissatisfaction.8. Don't get hung up
People with a complex character can no longer be remade, retrained and reeducated. And with age, the problem, on the contrary, is usually aggravated. You do not need to scroll in your head your conflicts and conversations, other people's words and behavior.
They can be analyzed for a long time, but conflicts are almost inevitably repeated over and over again, even if you try very hard to please this person.
The only question is how easily and simply you yourself will survive this new round of history, save your face, remain calm and stop tormenting yourself for a new conflict.
You will also be interested to read:
- Top 5 Questions and Answers About Domestic Violence
- What phrases should not be said to victims of violence
- How to deal with "energy vampires" - advice from psychologists
