Zero Mom: 7 Ways to Cope with Burnout

Every mother constantly shares a lot with her children internal resource: love, patience, care. She keeps the family's home and life in order, spends a lot of time to ensure that all the family's needs are met, often to the detriment of her own desires.

And, of course, the mother's inner resource is depleted. This is a normal phenomenon, burnout overtakes both working mothers and housewives.

Each woman may have her own reasons: constant suppression of her own desires and needs, lack of results of her activities, a feeling of meaninglessness of everything that happens, the same type of every day, lack of support and gratitude, physical fatigue, lack of sleep and etc.

It is important to fight burnout. After all, it brings suffering to you and your loved ones.

Signs of maternal burnout

• health problems: frequent headaches, pain in the back, neck and limbs,
• constant depressed mood, not happy with activities that usually brought pleasure;
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• complete lack of sexual desire;
• feeling of constant fatigue even immediately after waking up;
• there is no strength for everyday affairs, self-care;
• loved ones cause only negative emotions and guilt for these emotions;
• memory has deteriorated, it is difficult to concentrate;
• you constantly want to eat, you overeat - or your appetite has disappeared altogether.

The main thing to remember is that burnout goes away. You are tired, you need to take care of yourself and not jump to conclusions.

Promise yourself not to make any life-changing decisions until your spirits are up.

How a mom can deal with burnout

1. Plan your vacation

Mom should have regular rest and time for herself. You can make excuses for a long time that you are working, that no one helps you with your child, there is no time even for business, let alone for yourself, etc.

Burnout often occurs when the child is sick - the mother simply runs out of strength, but it is also unrealistic to rest here.

But you need to face the truth: if a person is hungry, he must eat, if he wants to sleep, then only sleep will help him out, and if he is tired, then only rest.

You are a wise and multi-tasking mom who always thinks out how to spend your energy. This means you can figure out how to find time to rest.

Time for yourself and for relaxation will not arise out of nowhere. If no one has offered you help before, then it is unlikely that they will suddenly do it.

If you can't find yourself a free day or evening, let it be at least a couple of hours, but regularly and only for yourself. Not to cook borscht, do the cleaning, etc., but time for yourself and for your own pleasure. Think in advance about what you will do, prepare your family and all your affairs so that no one should touch you at this time.

2. Attract friends and family

It is often uncomfortable for mothers to ask for help, but if you are in a state of complete burnout, then you have reached the boiling point, in which there is no other way out. You need to get distracted, switch over, and at least temporarily assign babysitting to someone else.

Tell your friend / relative / mom / dad / brother about this directly that you are in urgent need of rest. Often, even those close to you may not be aware of your true state. Helping you to sit with your child one evening a month is not such a difficult task for them.

And remember that a lot of people just feel uncomfortable saying no. Use this to your advantage, you need it more now.

3. Create enjoyable daily rituals

Do something joyful and enjoyable for yourself every day. Make it your daily self-care ritual.

In the morning, distract the child with a cartoon and while sitting, calmly, slowly, have a cup of hot coffee with a healthy sandwich.

Make yourself a nourishing face mask during the day.

In the evening before bed, devote at least 20 minutes to reading an interesting book (not about children and parenting). Buy yourself nice and comfortable sleepwear, and change your bedding often to enjoy falling asleep.

4. Meditate

For a visible effect, you don't need to be a guru of spiritual practices or sit in some tricky position.

It is enough to set aside 10 minutes a day (you can do it - just delete Instagram from your smartphone).

Sit in a comfortable position, close your eyes, focus on slow and calm breathing: inhale for 6 counts, exhale for another 6 counts. Try not to think about anything, pay attention only to your breathing, feel how calmly your arms and legs lie, how your shoulders and neck relax.

After 10 minutes of such relaxation, you will have much more strength and good mood than after a dose of caffeine.

5. Set goals

Set goals for yourself to see your progress and results. It doesn't matter if it's small or large.

Challenge yourself, plan your path and achieve your goal. Lose weight by 5 kg, hold out for 2 weeks without sweets, learn to do push-ups 50 times, walk 15 km a day, read 4 books a month, tie a hat to your child - it's not the point of what you will do yourself.

But it must be something with a visible and tangible result.

6. Train your body

You can always find an excuse not to play sports. But our task is to find an opportunity.

Physical activity has long been proven to be an excellent antidepressant. So use it, it certainly won't get any worse.

Do your morning exercises, gradually increasing its duration.

Can't figure out which exercises you should do? Find a channel on TV or YouTube that shows group exercises in the morning. Do it alone, with your husband or children, do not hesitate.

Can't go to the gym? Don't have sports equipment? Exercise at home with your own weight. Push up, jump, squat - a million exercises, just google it.

7. Become a volunteer

Find 1-2 projects in which you can do charity work and provide all possible help.

Often, helping other people who are in an even more difficult situation charges you with strength, the desire to live, help even more, and see the real results of your efforts.

And most importantly: don't go all out. Overeating, an abundance of sweets, alcohol, cigarettes - all this will not eliminate the true cause of your condition, but will only worsen your health and make your feelings of guilt stronger.

All you need is self-care. Though small, but regular.

Wm will also be interesting to read:

• How to Stop Stressing Stress - 8 Tips
• 6 types of fatigue and how to deal with them
• how to deal with "energy vampires" - advice from psychologists