Do you have real friends? Such as to follow you into fire and water? Those who will be there in sorrow and in joy? Those who will not be afraid of your problems, will not envy your successes, and will not gossip about you behind your back? Friendship is a mutual process. So, if in a friendly relationship you give more than you get, then you are likely to be used. If a friend cannot support you in difficult times, then why do you need him in your moments of happiness? This is rubbish to get rid of, leaving it behind.
If you notice these 4 signs on the part of your “friends”, then you should reconsider your attitude towards them!
Lack of support
“A friend in need will not leave, will not ask too much…” Is this about your friends or not? If you cannot rely on a person, you cannot count on his help in difficult times, but you yourself help with advice and deed, then you should reconsider your attitude towards such a friend. Well, think for yourself, how many times have you got out of your business to go to help a friend. Forget about work, and even interrupted family dinners because a friend needed your support? You consider him a dear person, so you never refuse to help him. But, as soon as you have some kind of trouble in your life, and you turn to him for advice or help, he finds thousands of excuses not to help. He is always busy for you, sick, unavailable. But friendship is a mutual relationship, not a game with only one goal.
Constant resentment
And what if it suddenly happens that you just can't rush to a friend for help? Let's say you have a serious meeting at work, you need to sit with a sick child, or your car breaks down and you just can't come? How does your friend react? After all, such cases are extremely rare. If your friend immediately takes offense, reproaches you that you did not support, did not help, did not abandon everything and everyone for his sake, then you should also reconsider your relationship. A true friend will always be in position. And, if he immediately begins to take offense at you, then this is very similar to blackmail, moral oppression and manipulation!
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Hidden envy
There is a saying - "a friend is known in trouble", and there is another one that has appeared in our time - "a friend is known in happiness"! What does it mean? Here we are talking about the fact that a true friend will be sincerely happy for you if you achieve success. And the one who only pretends to be a close and faithful friend will be jealous, and hidden. The inability to celebrate a friend's success is the clearest sign of an envious person. Pay attention, if in the joyful moments of your life a person is silent or through his teeth shows his joy, hiding irritability and resentment in his eyes, then he is clearly jealous of you!
Criticism in front of others
A true friend can and should criticize. He should point out to you your shortcomings, correct if you are wrong, but not in the company of people. A fake friend will deliberately poke you into your flaws, and criticize your failures in front of other people. With you alone, he will be completely different, he will behave as if nothing had happened. And, even if you reproach him for his wrong behavior, he will shrug his shoulders and say that he didn’t want to, not on purpose, and that he didn’t think he shouldn’t say that. In fact, he said all this on purpose to humiliate you in public. What kind of friend is he after that?
No one should abuse their confidence. This is respect for your own "I". If someone once betrayed their trust, they will definitely do it again. Better to say goodbye to such people right away. Check your friends for "lice"! Maybe not all of them wish you well?
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The original article is posted here: https://kabluk.me/psihologija/4-priznaka-nenastoyashhih-druzej.html
