No one is safe from parting with a loved one. We are going through this hard, but then we get back on our feet and live on. However, there are signs that many admit when parting, and which only aggravate a person's state of mind.
The only correct decision when breaking up is to cut off the relationship. There is no need to pull, dodge the conversation, postpone parting until later, sparing the feelings of your partner. There is no easy way to break up. It is always difficult and painful. It always hurts, even if you've already stopped loving each other. Even if you decide that it will be easier for you apart. But you need to part, if you decide, then you shouldn't torture each other!
It hurts to leave. However, there are some mistakes that only make things worse! They must not be allowed!
Mistakes that many make when parting
The phrase "it's not about you, it's about me"
Well, here it is clear that it may be true in you. You fell out of love, are not ready for a serious step, realized that you have nothing in common with a person. However, you are parting with a living person, so you simply have to give him a reasonable explanation. The phrase "it's not about you" sounds like a lie. After all, in fact, you realized that it is with this person that you are unhappy at the moment. Understand that this will not make the separation less painful. Therefore, it is better to be honest about the reason for the separation.
Delaying parting
When a couple has been in a relationship for a long time, it is clear that when the sudden realization comes that there are no feelings, it is difficult to take and immediately part. Indeed, in addition to love, there is a habit, common interests, and in general a person can become important and dear over a long period. And so, you postpone the moment of separation, plan it in advance, but something stops you. You hope that things will change in the relationship. But practice shows that most often nothing changes over time, and you only make it worse by this delay. Don't want to hurt your partner? Then imagine that you still part with him, and he understands that you have long wanted to do this. Doesn't that hurt more?
Parting by correspondence
You should never part by correspondence. Even if it is difficult for you, you are afraid to tell the whole truth in your face, you cannot find the right words that you can say. All the same, you need to part only in person. So it will be fair! Otherwise, this is real disrespect for the person whom you called your beloved yesterday.
Justifying your feelings
It is not your fault that you have stopped loving a person, that you want to part with him. Don't make excuses because your feelings have changed. Be honest with yourself, say it the way it is. It's better to admit everything right away than to get stuck in a relationship that has no future.
Thoughts of mutual friends
Perhaps you have a lot of mutual friends, and therefore you understand that, after parting with a person, you will have to limit communication with them. You really worry that friends will remain on his side, and you are afraid to be left without them. If this happens, then your friends are not real. True friends never leave. Even if they are mutual acquaintances, they will find time to spend time with you and with him.
Offer to stay friends
It's mean to suggest that the person who loves you stay friends. Think, does he want this? By the way, he can grab such a proposal as a straw. He can become your best friend, he will always be there, but he will always hope that you will be together again. Do not offer your friendship, cut everything at once. It will hurt him, but there is simply no other way!
"Wedge by wedge ..."
It is also wrong to start dating someone else immediately after breaking up. Take a break, focus on your goals and dreams, do not rush to start new relationships.
Read also: 7 conditions of your nails that can indicate a problem in the body
The original article is posted here: https://kabluk.me/psihologija/7-oshibok-pri-rasstavanii-kotorye-nelzya-dopuskat.html
