You will not believe your ears: your child bullies?! Yes, he's an angel! Blame the teachers, children rude or is it something else? We understand!
Your usually obedient child went to kindergarten orschool- and it seemed to have changed. He does not listen to teachers, quarrels and even fights with other children. What happened to him and how to fix it?
Not mischief, and alarm
Parents, teachers who say that their children misbehave, often make two mistakes:
- Angry with the child. Yes, it is unpleasant to listen to complaints and criticisms of educators and teachers. However, try to take the bad behavior of the child, not as deliberate sabotage, and as a signal notifying the adults, something goes wrong.
- Consider if the behavior of the child's parents are responsible only in an educational institution, and that they must do something. In fact, these problems must be solved in close cooperation with teachers and psychologists institution which the child attends.
Of course, in an ideal world, employees of schools and kindergartens are able to do to deal with such situations: teach children to build relationships in the team, helping them to pass adaptation crises. But in practice, many teachers can not cope with this task, and they need help from their parents. However, remember that the responsibility for the result is not only on you but also on the people who specially studied to work with children.
Top 5 reasons why children behave in school is worse than at home / istockphoto.com
Hear all, analyze the behavior
How can you help your child and his teachers?
- Talk with the teacher. Ask as much detail to describe situations in which your son (or daughter) misbehaves. Maybe they have something in common: for example, the child ceases to be heard towards the end of the lesson (of the day), or when the teacher gives him some specific instructions or making comments. Also ask the teacher to remember moments in which the child's behavior does not raise any problems. Perhaps they also have some repetitive details.
- Then ask the teacher (ideally also a school psychologist) to observe your child and celebrate all times when he is being disobedient or, on the contrary, well-behaved.
- Talk to your child. Sometimes the children themselves can talk about their concerns. You can help him in this, using the so-called "projective techniques", especially if the child is small. For example, to write a story together with your child about the bunny, which was misbehaving in kindergarten. Or play school: let the child plays the role of the teacher and the teddy bear is a naughty student. During the game, ask her son (daughter) why Bunny / Bear bullies and as a caregiver / teacher can help him. Most likely, the child's response will be directly related to his own situation.
Analyze the information gathered, the best - together with teachers. Probably will contain the answer to the question in it, what happens to the child. And we will help you to understand.
Top 5 reasons why children behave in school is worse than at home / istockphoto.com
Top 5 reasons for the poor child's behavior in school / kindergarten
1. incomprehension
School or kindergarten rules are very different from those adopted by the House. As a result, the child or does not know how to behave, or simply does what used to, and it displeases teachers. Usually this encounter kids who just went to the garden (and the later the parents give the child in the garden, so it is more difficult to rebuild), as well as first-graders, who had previously been "home" children.
Ask the teacher a list of rules that you need to convey to the child, and then detail them Speak with your baby. Explain to him that they have been prescribed for a reason and why it is important to comply with each of them. For example, during a lesson can not talk with a neighbor, get up and walk around the classroom, because it makes it difficult for children to listen to the teacher's explanations. Help in this matter, and drawings, and favorite child role-playing game in the kindergarten / school where the kid teacher inspires toys rules of conduct.
2. Low prestige of the teacher
Home child listens to mom-dad, grandparents, because he loves you, trusts and appreciates your relationship. And you have some leverage on it (allow watch cartoons, to sweet). Teacher same - the new man for him, confidence has not yet earned, and little or no effect on him not having. So why listen to him?
Help the teacher to earn the credibility of the child. You are well aware of your baby - his hobbies strengths. Tell the teacher how best to behave and how to interest the child that he no longer listened to him. The teacher, who knows the individual characteristics of the child, it is easier to interest him by offering some type of activity, which it exactly captivate. For example, instruct it to perform at the festival, showing tricks, or to make a report about dinosaurs.
3. Absence of friends or inability to communicate with their children
Games with their peers - one of the most important activities in a child's life. However, not all children understand how to interact with other children and make friends. In such a situation, the child can start to fight, name-calling or attract the attention of their peers in different pranks. This is especially true for children who have recently arrived in the new team: just started going to kindergarten / school or transferred from another educational institution.
- Prompt your child the proper way to conduct a team: for example, does not take away, and ask for a toy, offer to play together, to call the teacher.
- It is important that the teacher has worked on team building. For example, added to the calendar team games, theatrical staging scenes, the collective quiz, the there is something that your child acted together with other children and could show them their best side.
Top 5 reasons why children behave in school is worse than at home / istockphoto.com
4. Causes of physiological character
Children often act up and misbehave when tired or hungry, when they are hot, stuffy, or they sit too long in one place.
It all depends on the cause of the problem behavior. If the child's desk is near the window and it's hot from the sun or a functioning battery, ask for his transplant. If the child is a bully when hungry, and the food that is given in kindergarten, he refuses to eat, arrange with the teacher so that he could bite homemade food. If your baby is very mobile and it would be hard for a long time to sit in one place, ask the teacher often take breaks in training.
5. When the parents should review their methods of education
There are, and vice versa: a child at school / garden just a good girl, but at home it impossible to deal with there. The reasons are often the same: an educational institution he is experiencing discomfort, but restrained, and then let off steam at home. It is worth to test this hypothesis! But it could be like this: the child with strangers does not risk to be capricious, demanding his (or tried but failed). A native always fulfill his every whim - that he Viet one rope. Then, parents should review their methods of education.
Also you will be interested to read this: Roma education: a unique methodology and practices
