Sometimes it happens that people, attractive appearance, we do unpleasant and seemingly inconspicuous, on the contrary, are of interest. Where there is sympathy and antipathy to the one to the other? What is it - chemistry, magic, balance of interests? But everything is quite simple. If you know a few simple tricks, you can appeal to anyone.
Yes Yes! You heard right: the grumpy-law, and a bad neighbor on the landing, and the loud-mouthed boss. Do not take this material as a call to manipulation and hypocrisy. But sometimes it is difficult to establish relations with some people, contact with which is inevitable. How, then, to avoid conflicts? Trust in this regard, Professor of Psychology, FBI agent with experience, Jack Shafer, from which the mouth of the Golden Rule charm is: "Make interlocutor like myself." What does this mean and how we can achieve this, versed version of the site Kolobok.ua.
1. Make no mistake. Jack Shafer says that when he begins to read a series of lectures at the new flow of students intentionally makes some mistake. And one of his students fixes. He pretends to be embarrassed and grateful. What it does: students feel more confident, emancipated with a new coach and do not afraid to make a mistake. Give people feel that you are not perfect and they will be much nicer to chat with you.
2. Talk to people about themselves. It is known that self comes to the body. And the most interesting topic of conversation - is ourselves. Sincerely interested in how things are going with your interlocutor, his problems, biography, family, and you're sure to position it to yourself. That's what they say on the subject experts in communication: "When people talk about themselves, it does not matter - in a personal conversation or on social networks, make use of the same pleasure centers in the brain as a delicious food or money. " (Robert Lee Holtz)
"You have forged more friends in two months, if you have a genuine interest in people, more than two years trying to get them interested in himself." (Dale Carnegie)
3. Compliments from a third party. People really like to be praised, but sometimes direct compliments sound too intrusive. Want to praise in-law and did not make her suspicious, say, "My friend Tanya still remembers the cake that you baked for my birthday. He says nothing like this has ever tried. There will be time, write me retseptik ". And here we come to the next rule.
4. Ask for a favor.American president Benjamin Franklin once said: "He who once made you good, again more likely to help you than the one to whom you have helped yourself." Therefore, you want to please a man, ask him for a favor, and do not do anything for him.
When a person is doing you a favor, he feels his importance, he was pleased to be good. And because this feeling is associated with you, and he likes you. And when you do something for him, he feels that you somehow obliged and it pushes and causes rejection. This phenomenon psychologists are called "effect of Benjamin Franklin." But it is worth considering that the requests should be easy to follow and not too frequent. Otherwise, you just start to tire.
5. Let the people praise themselves.For example, a colleague tells how much work he had to invest in a certain project. "As you all had? You probably did not sleep at night?! "- admiringly exclaim you. "Yes, I had to work hard," - recognizes a colleague. Make a man a compliment to his own mouth to the man himself admitted his merits and praised themselves - it's aerobatics in communication. Peace to you and inner harmony!
