What can parents do to make their child's self-esteem adequate - not overestimated or underestimated?
1. Accept, love the child, regardless of the actions. Hug and say kind words. The worse the child behaves, the more he needs it.
2. Emphasize your child's strengths and strengths. He himself knows about the shortcomings. Encourage your child to show their talents and abilities.
3. Lead by example: a person with adequate self-esteem does not engage in manipulations, knows how to defend his opinion and his rights, is not afraid to be funny or look stupid.
4. Develop new skills in your child, broaden your horizons, teach cultural diversity. Knowledge is important not in the form of school grades, but in the form of an adequate perception of the world.
5. Teach your child to apply things: how to grow a plant, cook food, repair a toy or bicycle, change a wheel in a car, sew clothes, etc. The more confident and independent he feels, the higher his self-esteem.
6. Give your child a choice. The ability to make decisions directly determines self-esteem. Do not blame for the wrong choice - you cannot do without mistakes. And no "but I said".
7. Do not interfere with childish curiosity. Within the framework of the law and safety regulations, of course. If the child has an interest in some area or in some kind of sport, encourage it.8. Teach a healthy lifestyle. Here you can’t do without a personal example. No one, except you, will teach a child such basic things as taking care of yourself, about your appearance, health, and hygiene. It will be useful to teach your child to dress stylishly. But if he does not want to listen to fashion advice and stands his ground - do not interfere.
Exercises That Boost Your Child's Self-Esteem
1. "I"
Place a photograph of the child on the center of the sheet of paper. Suggest that they fill in the space around the photo with a list of the merits and achievements that he has.
If you wish, you can create a collage of photographs that illustrate these positive points. Place the collage in the child's room - this way it will constantly remind you of the good.
If the child is uncomfortable, you can make the same collage with a story about yourself. This way, attention will not be focused exclusively on the child - he will feel more free.
2. "You"
You can play with your family or company. Take several identical pieces of paper, write the names of those present on them. Put in the hat and stir.
Each draws out one sheet and writes three positive qualities of the person whose name is indicated there.Then the leaves are mixed again. The presenter takes turns drawing out the sheets and reads out what has been written, or distributes to each sheet with his name.
3. Internal settings
An insecure person constantly conducts an internal dialogue, which only reinforces this insecurity. It's time to change negative attitudes to positive ones.
Take a piece of paper, divide it into 2 columns. In the left we write the usual negative beliefs - "I am the worst of all", "everyone will laugh at me", in the right - we turn them into positive: "I try and get better every day", "they can laugh at everyone, it doesn't say anything about me, I have friends who I am appreciated. "
Of course, again, it is worth showing by your own example how to do this.
4. Visualization
Divide the sheet into three columns. In the first, we write an event or action: for example, "I'm afraid to answer at the blackboard." The second column contains the worst case scenario: "I will forget the correct answer and everyone will laugh." In the third - a good scenario: "even if I forget something, nothing terrible will happen, in 5-10 minutes everyone will forget about it."
Or, "I'm afraid to meet new people." What's the worst going to happen? "They won't talk to me." What happens in a better and more realistic way? "I will have new friends."When you can clearly see what is good and what is bad, then abstract fears go away.
5. Challenge "I'm afraid, but ..."
It is better to involve the whole family in it and at the same time work through your own fears and self-esteem. On a piece of paper, all together make a general list of fears and how you will overcome them.
For example, "I'm afraid to make a phone call, but I'm going to call a stranger right now." And everyone must do it. Of course, there is no need to engage in telephone terrorism. But you can call the ad and ask a few questions to a stranger. Children can call their acquaintances who were embarrassed to call earlier.
As part of the challenge, you can sing and dance on the street, ask neighbors to borrow something, go live on social networks, etc.
You will also be interested to read:
- How to teach a child to argue correctly
- How to teach a child to save money and take care of the environment
- 5 ways to teach your child the most important things in life
